Sunday, August 14, 2005

So Friday morning wasnt the most relaxing.

I walk out- find my tire is flat. Ugh. No big deal, but ugh. Ok- lets change a tire. Ive done it a few times in my life- shouldnt be a problem. BUT- i dont have a jack for my car- only Holly's car, the Jetta. I take out her jack, crank the car up a bit, then realize that I dont have a tire- iron that fits my car. Hmm. OK- AutoZone is down the street. I drive over, grab a tire iron and a jack (since I dont have one), and head back to the house. Put the car down, loosen the lugnuts, crank up the car again, take the tire off.... then.... well... Im quite embarrassed about this one- dont tell my father in law... the car, which was too heavy for the Jetta jack in the first place, starts to lean out and fall over. I scramble out of the way and watch the car fall onto the brake cylinder.

At this point Holly comes out, and politely asks if she needs to call AAA. Are you kidding me? I got me into this mess- im gonna get me out. I take the new jack, realize that it is too short for my car, go get some bricsk to set it on, crank up the car again, realize that the jack is still set too far back on the frame and is starting to lean..... take it down, put the Jetta jack back on (just for a second), crank back up the new jack closer to the wheel well, check the brake cylinder (as if I could tell if there was something wrong...) and put the tire on. This only took two hours. I only cried once, out of frustration and self loathing.

I think Dale Jr needs a new pit crew member. Maybe Ill apply.

I then go to work, late, and jump on a mower. I take one swipe across the lawn and run over a nest of ground bees. I have never ran so fast or been so angry at the air around me in my life. I left the mower running,blades spinning and headed for a ditch, as I ran like a girl, kicking and screaming and cursing and swatting. I was stung fifteen times, all on my legs- because I was late for work, I wore the only thing clean... shorts.

As I am recovering my senses, scenes from "My Girl" start to run through my head. I dont even know if Im allergic to bees- im allergic to everything, surely bees are included.... but to my relief, minutes passed and I didnt stop breathing or go into anaphylactic shock, so I guessed I was fine, other than the overwhelming desire to cut my legs off.

This is what it is like to be TJ for a morning. Amazing I got to 24, huh?


At 5:25 PM, Blogger BSC said...

Pubic hair removal? Now THAT's a first.

Let this be a lesson to everyone that people should always go out and uy a proper jack. The ones that come with the cars are impossible to manage.

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